Simon O’Kane from Wakefield, Yorkshire, posted a picture of long-suffering wife Leandra alongside a tongue-in-cheek ad detailing his reasons for selling her and the pros and cons of the “purchase”.
The father-of-two made the listing after he claimed Leandra was not playing the role of a devoted wife.
The 33-year-old was stunned when bids hit £65,880 within two days – though Leandra “wanted to kill him” when she discovered the next day that she was “for sale”.
Simon, a telecom engineer and proud owner of a Triumph Daytona 650, said: “I came in after work feeling a bit tired and unwell – my was wife doing the usual concerned bit but said I was burning the candle at both ends and was basically just whining at me.
I thought ‘right I’m going to put you up for sale’.”
The post reads:
“For sale one wife.
Not new has been used but still got some good miles left in her.
Reason for selling… I’ve had my fill and feel like there HAS to be someone me (oh dear God please let there be).
Good points: Body work and paint work still in decent shape and has some skills in the kitchen.
Bad points: Often makes this noise that cannot be silenced unless you order brand new shiny parts of metal.
Sometimes them [sic] skills in the kitchen result in you ending up in hospital.
All in all not a bad model for the year, I’m sure some lucky guy will get lots of use.
Offers welcome, may consider a part exchange for a younger model.
*T&Cs: Once bought you cannot return… EVER!”
When Leandra found out about the prank she hit the roof.
Leandra, 27 and a beauty therapist, said: “I was absolutely fuming – I wanted to kill him.
Everyone at work saw it and were laughing their heads off. Not only did he put me up for sale but he used such a bad photo.
He always moans he’s poorly, he’s a hypochondriac, then he swans off to the gym for three, four hours at a time.
I told him if that if he can go to the gym then he doesn’t deserve my sympathy.
If eBay hadn’t taken the listing down, who knows how much I would have got?”
After the first few bids trickled in Mrs O’Kane proved a hit with bids soaring to more than £65,000.
Fellow bikers got in on the joke by asking questions about mileage and upkeep.
Simon said: “There were a few general pervy guys asking for more pictures but most of the responses to the ad were hilarious.
The best one was ‘has she raced or rallied?’ We both liked the guy looking to exchange her for a camel, and the guy trying to work out how much bacon he could get really got us howling.”
The serial joker admitted that he’s a big kid at heart and has a history of pranks on Leandra.
Simon said: “I do a lot of stuff, but nothing as outlandish as this one.
I work away from home quite often and said I’d found her a really nice BMW for sale that I thought she’d like and was going to buy for her.
She was dead excited about it – then when I sent her picture it was one of a really battered £300 BMW.
She really didn’t like me for a while after that one.
I also told her I’d got her a Mulberry bag, but it was just a bag from down the fruit and veg market.
I just think it’s fun.”
Despite being the butt of Simon’s perpetual jokes, Leandra does manage to get her own back on him.
When he trains at Steel Evolution Martial Arts, a gym he owns, Leandra makes sure his pals have a laugh at his expense.
Simon said: “When she comes down to the gym she takes the mickey and tries to make out I’ve done something embarrassing.
They all go along with it and take her side – but it’s only a bit of fun.”
Leandra said: “He’s like a little child with his pranks, so it’s good to get down to the gym and get my own back.
All his huge cage fighting mates are petrified of little 5ft 5in me – they all cower to me, it’s really funny.”
Now Simon has to pay for his prankster ways, as Leandra says she’ll be taking revenge – on his wallet.
Leandra said: “The punishment for this particular prank will be his bank card.
I was going to have a new Mulberry bag for Christmas but I’m not waiting until then, I’m going to have it for my birthday in November.”
Simon said: “I’m really lucky that she’s such a legend and takes all my pranks on the chin.
I was disappointed the listing was taken down, mainly because I wanted to see how high it would go but it was a for laugh so I wasn’t actually gutted.
It wasn’t like I’d actually let someone have her – she’s too good.
I’d like to say I’d have spent the cash on my dream garage and a bunch of lads’ holidays out on the bikes, but the reality is I’d have probably spent it on getting her back.
I think they’d have been a lot of grovelling and a lot of handbags being bought.
Either that or I’d be spending the money on security from my wife.”